“Our fellowship is open to women and men, regardless of age, race, religion, ethnic background, marital status, or occupation. We welcome members of any sexual identity or orientation, whether they are gay, lesbian, straight, bisexual, or transgender.”
— Sex Addicts Anonymous, p. 1-2
Welcome! We know that it takes an extra step of courage for you to be here and we applaud you for that and support your search for recovery. If you have a desire to stop addictive sexual behavior of any type, you are welcome here. We urge you to give our program a try. It has helped many other women — of all ages, backgrounds, and sexual orientations — find recovery for sexual addiction.
The next step is for you to find a meeting to attend. We suggest that you attend six local meetings or tele-meetings before deciding if SAA is a good fit for you. Give yourself time to orient yourself to all of this new information. Be gentle with yourself as you take the time to decide whether this program is for you.
At your first meeting, you will have the opportunity to receive a “Newcomers Packet.” This packet contains vital information about our program and includes literature on the specific concerns of women in SAA. Some women are reluctant to attend mixed gender meetings. We want to encourage you to do what feels comfortable but to remember that you are always welcome at these meetings. Sometimes we fear that we may “trigger” another member through our sharing or even by our mere presence! Please know that we are all here to work towards healing and growth. All triggering events are opportunities for us to grow in our recovery and we would never want to hinder the participation of a fellow recovering sex addict. Protecting other members is not your responsibility. Come as you are, you may discover you are right where you are meant to be.
“Many of us, male, female, or transgender, came into the fellowship with pre-conceived ideas about the nature of our addiction. For example, we may not believe that women can be real sex addicts. We may even encourage them to attend meetings in another Twelve Step Fellowship where they may “be more comfortable,” furthering this mistaken belief. However, we find when we share together at meetings simply as sex addicts that we are more alike than not”.
— from “Safe and Sexually Sober Meetings: Helping Women Feel Welcome in Your Meetings” page 2. © International Service Organization of SAA, 2012
Sponsorship is an important tool for our recovery in SAA. Sponsorship gives us the gift of wisdom and direction from another person in recovery who is further down the path than us. Meetings are the ideal place to find a sponsor. Listen to stories of those who have traveled down the path of recovery and notice who resonates with you. Find a sponsor who seems to have the type of healing that you are looking for. Remember, if the person you ask is unable to sponsor you, this only means that the right sponsor for you is still “out there.” Keep asking and don’t take a “no” response personally. We do not recommend that you choose a sponsor of the opposite sex or someone you are attracted to. Keep an open mind as to who can assist you on this journey; there is no perfect sponsor.
Our literature is vital to our program. Literature provides support and insight whenever you need it. Many of us rely on literature when we are traveling or don’t have access to meetings. Early in your sobriety, literature is a must. Read it even when you don’t feel like it — it really will help! Literature helps to orient your mind to a recovery perspective. Consider establishing a regular routine that involves reading literature every day. Even just a few minutes can make a difference.
SAA Women’s Intergroup
The SAA Women’s Intergroup was formed in 2018 by members of the Women’s Outreach Committee [WOC] (with others), who saw the need for an autonomous service organization focused on the needs of SAA women. We took over helping organize and fund retreats for women from the WOC. As a service committee, we can accept donations targeted for women’s use (the WOC cannot). We have funded women’s workshops and retreats and assisted women in attending the annual convention in our brief existence.
Today we are much more than just a funding committee. Targeting the resource needs of new women members as we see them:
3) connections, and
4) stories of women.
Our website, https://saaforwomen.org, includes comprehensive help finding these resources in one location. We have links to all SAA intergroups, including yours, not limited to what the ISO provides. We link to your intergroup web address and women’s phone and email contacts. In addition, we include links to the Telemeeting Intergroup (which today lists 244 electronic meetings each week) and much more.
More information and FAQs can be found at https://saa-recovery.org/women/